Preach loud truth
420 blaze it Tollers
Jam session
Ceiling Lolkien
Shoot the Tolkpedo
Poke the Heretic
Chaika? Yes Chaika

Five Thousand Elephants

A short, non-Tolkien poem about public nudity amongst elephants, and its none-too-pleasant consequences.


Five thousand elephants
Put on white underpants
They didn't fit so well
And off their butts they fell.

Five thousand elephants
Lacked any human hands
To cover nudishness
In lands of prudishness.

Five thousand elephants
Naked on both their ends
Were busted by police
For lack of underpiece.

Grey and big elephants
Numbering fiv-ish grands
Five yards from heads to tail
Now clutter up the jail.

Judge had some common sense
And said in their defence:
"This is stupidity!"
And then he set them free.

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A comprehensive collection of short truths from J.R.R. Tolkien's life, and the many wonders and miracles he bestowed upon the world. Put together and published here for the first time!


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